Sunday, October 14, 2007


My title today is taken from the Buddhist expression, "If you can't find peace where you are standing where do you need to go to find it?" We have learned to gripe about anything so if you can't find something to complain about in this moment, what makes you think that something lousier is going to come along? When people say to me, "I can't complain," I respond, "I guess you aren't trying hard enough." Learning to bitch convincingly is a not a task to be taken lightly. Get completely committed if you are going to persuade another person that your complaint is worthy of sympathy. Don't just whine but take the time to ratchet yourself up as tight as the waistband on the pants of a champion pie eater, and then cut it loose like a wild bull out of the chute and sweep everybody else into it. Isn't that we all want? When we tell our story that we want somebody, anybody to say, "You poor thing", which for some strange reason makes us feel better. Getting someone else to feel miserable with us is a time tested tradition that was made famous in the "Show me State". That's why we all know the expression, "Missouri Loves Company". Since they spend so much time doing it Jews created a special word, 'Kvetch' which some say is the origin of the word, 'Bitch'

To find grief where you are standing is easier than finding happiness and that is nothing to complain about. Look around you and notice everything that could use improvement. Are you getting the idea? You car sucks, unless it is a hybrid. And your wardrobe? I know, "You use to complain that you had no clothes, until you met a man who had no body". Then there is your hair, face, eyes, ears, teeth, lips, waist line, hairline, which is enough to have you watching commercials in earnest looking for the solution that will work in 3 to 6 weeks or your money back. You have lots of reasons to be discontent (and I haven't even mentioned the government's war on anything/everything) so, "If you are going to complain, be grateful".
8 Michael Marlin 2007